How To Build Self Esteem

Feb 14, 2008

Having a lack of confidence and low self esteem is a common problem and prevents people from leading a full and happy life. So finding how to build self esteem, using methods that really work, is very important to many people. There are lots of self-help books and articles recommending ways to develop high self esteem. They are well-intentioned but often recommend methods that are not very effective in showing how to build up self esteem. Recent research is providing techniques that do work in ways to build self esteem.

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Goals

Feb 14, 2008

The first method recommended to develop self esteem is to have goals you are working towards. An activity on how to build self esteem is to record in a diary three concerns that you have in your life. Now simply write down some practical steps you can take to help resolve them. Review your progress after a week and continue to do so. Taking even small steps forward will boost your level of optimism and increase your self esteem. Keeping a diary is a very important tool in developing high self esteem, so the next recommendation we have also makes use of a diary.

Critical Thoughts

Feb 14, 2008

Much of the pain of depression and low self esteem has been found to stem from our critical thoughts. Because they become habitual and automatic they act to maintain our pessimism and prevent us from building self esteem. Often we don't even notice we are doing this to ourselves. Once you become aware of these negative put-downs, write them in your diary. Then, alongside, argue against them. For example, if your thought was "I'm hopeless, I always mess things up". You could dispute this by saying "No, I don't always mess up. I may have made a mistake this time, but I'm only human. This doesn't make me a bad person. In fact, I often get things right." By continuing on these lines, you'll draw the sting of your internal critic and can start to gain more self esteem. Our final technique discussed here can also be put into your diary: visualizing a better future.

Visualization

Feb 14, 2008

Visualizing your ideal future is often recomended for attaining goals and it can also work as part of how to build self esteem and confidence. But don't mistake this for daydreaming which is ineffective. An essential part of this method is to compare your imagined future with how reality is now. That way, you'll feel dissatisfied and increase your urge to change things. As mentioned before, moving towards yor goals will help lift your mood, relieve pessimistic thoughts and build your self esteem.